小红书刷到浴室二楼的帖子笑死我了

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好诗好诗

才发现是浴室测评哥

I will always love the school’s bathroom<br>Hi, friend<br>How many seven-year periods does one have in life?<br>I hope you don’t have a seven-year period<br>Living in a place with maximum density<br>Where toilets and showers explode in turns<br>This so-called 21st-century engineering<br>In the seventh year, the toilets start to rebel<br>Wall seams puff out light yellow smoke rings<br>Flip-flops drift on the water like boats<br>Water faucets snore in the corner<br>The cement floor maintains its ancient Greek silence<br>I realize<br>That the drain is the sexiest organ of the entire building<br>Brooms lie across the countertops<br>Perhaps tired from a great battle<br>Propped up by aluminum poles<br>Leaving behind the final advice:<br>The most romantic accomplice of this century<br>Is the Excel table from the finance office and the pipes from the infrastructure department<br>The cold mirror reflects pools of residual water<br>Silently telling tales of hardship and confusion<br>Winding streams flow over every inch of the ground<br>Rushing to declare freedom and wildness<br>Crowds gather<br>Struggling in this heartless flood<br>Plastic buckets carrying Clear and Pantene<br>They are the new Noah's Ark of the era<br>The school badge is mocked as goose droppings<br>Only then do I realize<br>This is realism<br>This place is not suitable for long stays<br>I walk out of the ankle-deep bathroom<br>On the fogged-up mirror<br>I write this ode<br>If tomorrow remains the same<br>The bathroom becomes a legend<br>I will be a witness to the legend<br><br>Written on a night in the year of the snake, month of the tiger, day of the ox, after bathing and dressing

我永远爱学校的浴室<br>嗨，朋友<br>人生能有几个七年<br>希望你不会有一段<br>住在顶级容积率<br>厕所浴室轮番爆炸<br>所谓二十一世纪工程<br>的七年<br>厕所开始起义<br>墙缝开始吞吐淡黄的烟圈<br>拖鞋在水面上漂泊如舟<br>水阀在墙角打鼾<br>水泥地面保持着古希腊式的沉默<br>我发现<br>排水口才是整栋楼最性感的器官<br>扫把横亘在桌台上<br>或许是经历过一场大战后的疲倦<br>用铝杆撑起佝偻的身躯<br>留下最后的规劝：<br>本世纪最浪漫的共犯<br>是财务处的Excel表和基建处的水管<br>清冷的镜子映照出一池池残水<br>无声的诉说苦楚与彷徨<br>蜿蜒的流水游走在一寸寸地面<br>奔涌着告知自由与猖狂<br>人群簇拥<br>挣扎在这无情的洪流<br>塑料桶载着清扬和飘柔<br>那是新时代的诺亚方舟<br>校徽被调侃成大雁拉屎<br>我才知道<br>这原来是写实主义<br>此地不宜久留<br>我走出齐脚踝的浴室<br>在起雾的镜片上<br>写下这首赞诗<br>若明日依旧<br>浴室变成了传奇<br>我便是传奇的亲历者<br><br>写于沐浴更衣后的乙巳蛇年戊寅月乙丑日夜

火了